INDEPENDENCE, Ky. -- How much is Simon Kenton High School worth?
According to a sarcastic ad posted by the “Class of 2014,” the school on Madison Pike in Independence is equal to a big truck, a lifetime supply of chaw, a country boy or a state championship in something other than bowling.
VIDEO: See reaction from school officials, parents in the player above
"Going off to college, so I don't need it anymore, need to save up my cash to pay off all these loans coming up," the ad stated.
It also listed the school's positive and negative attributes in list form:
Lots of trucks (some decent, some garbage. Some gas, some diesel)
Loads of concrete farmers (male and female)
Lots of Girls that will do anything to get a ride in said diesel trucks
SoSo sports programs, football was pretty good last year, basketball not so much (girls were good)
Lots of used chaw, and empty chaw cans.
Laptops that never work
Two flatscreens in the cafeteria
Textbooks (not many, not in very good condition)
Very persistent cigarette smoke smell in the freshman boys bathroom, administrators cant seem to put a finger on what may be causing it, so good luck..
Only teams that get funding are mens basketball and football, for obvious reasons.
Heating and cooling doesn't quite work correctly.
A few of the staff members tend to be extremely grouchy all the time.
Football field is excellent, the track however is not regulation size (hmm fishy)
Remodeled many times
Pool on roof
Comes with its very own day care
Lots of rooms
Nice gym and football field
If interested contact class of 2014.
Tony Mirones contributed to this story.