(L-R) Singers Niall Horan, Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik and Liam Payne of One Direction accept the award for Best New Artist onstage during the 2012 MTV Video Music Awards (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)
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Monday, Jan. 14th, 2013
It’s time once again for Monday Morning Musings. Start with a little light stretching, then off we go ...
— My kids went to a birthday party this weekend at a roller rink. I’m pretty sure I haven’t been to one since 1983, and nothing’s changed. I mean that literally: nothing changed. The carpet was mungy, the music was loud and the skates weighed roughly the same as a Smart Car.
But it certainly brought back memories. We went to East End Roller Rink in Memphis growing up — fairly regularly, as I recall. We must have been regulars: I had red and white pom poms that I tied to the front of my skates. That told everyone else skating to Wham! and Duran Duran that I was clearly a skating savant. Yes, that’s what they said.
— This weekend my younger daughter and I dove deep into the recesses of One Direction. In case you’re not aware, they’re the newest fabricated boy band that’s selling out arenas and making young girls swoon.
I should use this moment to admit something: I’m not hiding it under a bushel — no! I’m going to let it shine. Here it is: I’m a huge boy band fan, fabricated or not.
Anyway, 1D's (that’s what she calls it) latest video “dropped” last week, and my daughter has watched it about 112 times since. Did I mention that she’s only 6? That’s my point. I was all about some New Kids on the Block and New Edition back in the day, but I was in junior high school. Apparently, the boy-band gene strikes earlier as it’s passed from generation to generation.
— I think most of us wanted to see the Bengals advance in the playoffs (just one win, people. One. I’ll get to that in a bit). But after watching this weekend’s game, where three of the four were OUTSTANDING, I think all of us can really see the difference between the Bengals and these teams. It’s leaps and bounds. But I’m confident they’ll get there. One day. I have to be, because …
— I don’t ask for a lot. I really don’t. A daily nap, semi-polite and/or clean kids (you can’t have both at the once), some red wine, a full DVR, Sally Hansen Insta-Dri nail top coat ... I’m fairly simple.
But I swear, I need to see one of our local teams win in the postseason the way the guys from One Direction need hair products.
The problem is, I’ve lived here for 15 years – 15 YEARS! – and I’ve yet to see the Reds or Bengals win one game in the postseason. My money’s on the Reds to break through first. Fingers crossed for this year. Pitchers and catchers report in 28 days.
— I’m watching highlights from Miss America, and one thing strikes me. Here’s what I think of the moment the winner’s crowned: “Congratulations, you’re Miss America! Now squat for 40 seconds while last year’s winner grabs bobby pins out of her mouth to pin your crown on.”
It’s 2013, for goodness sake. Is there no better way?
Enjoy your Monday. Or at least try. Bobby pin it in there. It’ll stay.
From Today’s Show:
— Golden Globes: ABC described it this morning as Oscar’s “looser and more liquored-up” little brother. That’s pretty much right on. And when you have Tina Fey and Amy Poehler hosting, there’s not much better. Check the hits, the highlights and the big winners here .
— Thumbs Up from Parents, Thumbs Down from Kids: We covered two stories today your kids will despise:
1. A pilot program is testing a school year that’s 40 days longer — essentially year-round school — in several states (none in the Tri-State). U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan says America is falling behind the world educationally, and this will help the summer “brain drain.”
2. Australian researchers say TV in the hour and a half before bedtime makes it harder for kids to fall asleep, and therefore, makes your morning tougher. Go forth and conquer.
Today’s Distracting Link:
A bunch of distracting links in one.
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